Seek and ye shall find

Sometimes I try to recall the moment I chose to move to Ireland, and that memory is not there. There was never a moment when I said to myself “Ok, I’m ready, I can go”. Even that one way ticket feels like it had always been there.

Well, at least since when the Erasmus changed my mindset. I had always dreamt of going away, but everywhere felt so far. Searching for something, for some place, I ended up in Galway.

I dreamt of running away from my hometown during all my adolescence, until I had the opportunity of attending a college that was far enough. There I realized it was not only my city not to suit me, but the whole country.

I arrived in Galway for the Erasmus in 2010, moving to a new place, where people spoke in an accent I couldn’t understand, where I didn’t know anyone, to a new lifestyle and a lot of rain.

I arrived in Galway sure of who I was, a shy and clumsy person, who hated the rain.

After just 4 months I had to go back to my college town, I graduated and went back to live with my family. Everyone knows how impossible it is to live with your parents after being on your own for a few years.

In order to convince myself that I was moving forward in some kind of direction, I started commuting between Latina and Rome, starting a new course at college, chose completely at random.

But the bug was there, eating me, singing in gaelic, to make me dream of green fields. For the first time in my life I knew I wanted to go to a specific place, not any elsewhere.

Until I started feeling so tired and oppressed by the boundaries of my own house, my hometown, my country, my college, a series of expectations that are never yours, and comparisons with other people, who are always better than you.

I’m sure that ticket had always been there. I don’t even remember me packing.

One thing I will never forget, though, is the moment I said goodbye to my parents, the moment I saw my dad crying for the first time and because of me. And my mum telling me “never mind him, he’s getting old”. I’m so glad to my parents for never giving me an opinion on any of my decisions.

I landed in Dublin in 2013, and I stayed there for one year. There I found my first job in an insurance company. I didn’t like the job, and after one year I was mature enough to say no to a contract renewal. Without feeling guilty. I managed to go over the Italian mindset according to which you should just be glad for the fact that you have a job, any kind of job, as far as it pays the bills. This was the greatest lesson Dublin taught me.

And then came the shock, when I realized I didn’t like to live in Dublin. I finally understood that it was not Ireland I was looking for, but Galway.

Therefore, without friends and without a job, I took the leap towards my dream and I moved to this wonderful town, where I feel really at ease with myself.

Now I work in an IT multinational, I make my jewelry that I sell in markets, I live with my cat Dora, I have special friends, and I met Mr J, the man I love and keeps reminding me every day that we are here on this Earth to enjoy life and fight for our dreams.

I even found out that I’m not shy at all and I love rain!

Happy journey everyone!

Serena

Moonstone Serena

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