The Latin American iPhone

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If a Latin American had the opportunity to design an iPhone, which functions would he add? What are those simple applications that would make our life easier? After some time reflecting about the subject, I managed to compile some of the applications, that according to me, are essential for every Latin American.

The number of iPhone tools is vast, so much so that at times it is difficult to define if it is a phone with a camera, a camera with internet or a laptop with a phone. Some years ago (before they actually existed) nobody really thought that cellphones were a necessity, but later we heard about them, we bought them, and got attached to the point that they are almost an extension of our own hand. So it is very probable that in the (near?) future we would not be able to live without the following applications:

  • Interactive Excuse Generator
    In Latin America excuses are an important part of our lives, we use them at work, in the classroom, with our friends, with our family, that is, they are part of our culture. So the more excuses we know the better, you never know when you are going to need one.
  • Fake ID Printer
    Wouldn’t it be great to be able to print that fake ID you needed so badly right when you need it? Don’t take me wrong, we respect hierarchy… as long as we get to enjoy the perks of it. This application would give us that little push we need to reach a higher level on the hierarchical ladder. It would come in handy if you need to be of legal age for a night, if you need to be on a certain VIP list or if you need to pass for a police officer or for an actor or for a member of congress, it’s all possible.
  • Last Minute Planner
    As we all know, in Latin America we live in the present and tomorrow doesn’t exist, unless we need to postpone something. We live without worrying about what the future holds, and without much planning. For that reason it would be actually very useful to have a data base with possible last minute plans according to situation, weather or time of the day. For example: “Sunny day. Beach. GO.” “Anna alone at home. GO.” “Beer 50% off. BUY.”
  • Time Converter
    We have currency converters, then why not having time converters? The notion of time is not the same for everybody, thus, when Latin Americans say that they’ll be there at six, they really mean half an hour or probably an hour later. This simple application would once and for all get rid of the stigma of the unpunctual Latin American, and would end many time-related misunderstandings.
  • The macho-meter
    The word macho belongs to Spanish speakers, and we have kindly lent it to many other languages. Having that into account it is easy to imagine that being a “macho” is almost a life style for Latino guys. There even are some mysterious rules and parameters that apparently determine the level of manliness. So if you don’t wish to send the wrong signal or if you are one of those sensitive guys that would like to know where the limit between sensitivity and sissyness is, this might be the right application for you.
  • The interactive mirror
    With the time plastic surgery seems to be gaining more ground in Latin America. Thanks to beauty contests and supermodels, perfection is now the standard. Many Latinas would only dream about an interactive mirror that allows them to retouch those features they dislike about themselves. This application would turn anybody into a Valeria Mazza in only a matter of seconds.

You might think that some of these applications are a bit wacky, but as you all know, technology develops at a blinding pace. There are no limits to imagination; nothing is too absurd or too wild for iPhone or for Apple’s creative team. So, in a world where anything is possible, we shouldn’t be surprised if some high executive reads this article and takes it seriously.

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