We all know this: when we talk with a person with another nationality, the subject of the conversation is mostly about your home country. And when you have two nationalities, the party can really start! You will get a double portion of already known and heard comments, which make you feel uncomfortable and you don’t know how to answer. Just nod and keep on smiling baby, like this:
With the help of a random test I got to know how the average Italian thinks and starts a conversation and vice versa. Let’s have a closer look with some examples.
A conversation with an Italian begins more or less this way:
“So you’re coming from Holland?”
“Well yeah, but officially the country is called Kingdom of the Netherlands, Holland is a province. And more specifically: there is a South-Holland and a North-Holland.”
“So you must have a bike then? All Hollanders (*) cycle!”
*The geography lesson which you told before is being ignored already at the second question. You just nod.
“Then you must be smoking weed all day long!”
Followed by an anecdote of a wild weekend in Amsterdam, a couple of years ago which consisted of sitting in a coffeeshop all day long. Great man! And no, normal Dutch people don’t smoke 24/7.
The other way around is even better! In 90 % of the cases, the average Dutchie begins with the sentence Pasta pesto di mamma or Ciao Bella with an accent à la Mario and think they have an Italian accent, and speak Italian for real. Here’s a fact: Mario and Luigi appear Italian, but are a Japanese product. And I fear that the Japanese made a mistake regarding the Italian accent.
“Can you teach me more vulgar Italian words? I already know X and Y (pronounced with the Mario accent plus Italian hand gesture). I would like to elaborate my Italian vocabulary.”
Or this oldie but goldie:
“So your family is in the mafia?”
*Thinks: Watch out for the horse head in your bed… Gnagnagna*
Or this cherry on top:
“Do you eat pizza and pasta everyday?”
Soooo, let’s start a normal conversation next time, shall we?